*Tim’s voice chimes in over the roar of a MONSTER crowd on hand!!!!! The fans are way into it tonite and are rattling the rafters from the get go! Signs line the arena for all the names: Escobar in the House! Kon where you at FOO?!?, AC the new MASTER!, I think I just saw Bloodbath!, Welcome back EZ!, MOOOOOOO and many many more line the arena.*

Tim: WELCOME!!!!!!!!! TO AC NIGHT CHAOS!!!!!! This one is sooo big you aren’t even going to believe it!!!! We have a gauntlet match! We have Prophet and Jaguar in action, we have TWO Lard Asses here and the syncronized swimmers as well! This card is stacked!

Bowar: So is Taylor!

Tim: Well yes she is, and there she is in the ring ready to get something going here tonite....Taylor take it away!

Bowar: Taylor take it off.

*The fans start to chant "TAYLOR TAYLOR TAYLOR!!!!!!" There she is in the middle of the ring wearing a white gown her nipples almost visible under the top and the bottom curves of her tight ass just peak out from under the bottom of the skirt.*

Taylor: Ladies and Gentlemen....Please welcome, the founder of the feast so to speak....THERE IS ONLY ONE!!!!!! THE NASTIEST BASTARD IN THE SPORT.....AC!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Suddenly the already juiced crowd hits the roof. "Do the Evolution" Live Version by Pearl Jam blasts and out comes the Main Man alone wearing a pair of black shorts and his normal Blue Nike Warm ups. His hands go up in the air and the fans explode. AC gives the sign for the AC bomb, causing even further raving. AC gimps down the ramp a little, then stops....shakes his finger, and bends over to the brace at his knee....unstrapping it....slowly...then throwing it out into the audience. At a dead sprint now racing to the ring and sliding under the bottom rope. Taylor can’t help but applaud. The Fans still give AC the biggest mixed reaction in all of sports.*

Taylor: Welcome back to the show this week A.....

*AC yanks the mic away then points to the entrance.*

AC: Back to the corner sweet heart. We’ll call you when we need you to trot some old goat out to the ring.

*The fans now boo until Taylor gives AC a double bird turning them right around.*

AC: You all shut your damn mouths or she won’t be back out here tonite! That’s better now you keep them shut cause AC’s got some shit to say to a few choice individuals. Let me start right off with the sorry sack that I have to fight tonite! SHANK! Shit if I had been running this place from the start you can bet your gothic lifestyle ass that you never would have made it long enough to get the chance to desicrate one of MY titles! Leaving it sit in a Pickle Jar of your own piss. I tried to get Marcus to job you off and discard you a long time ago but hell I guess that when a fruit cake like you sells a couple of t-shirts and some solid bumps you must pay for your keep. But then you had to go and do what so many others are doing, biting the hand that feeds you and that hand is mine! The new Master....AC!

*AC paces a little and points toward the back entrance.*

AC: You are going to walk this aisle for the last time SHANK! THE LAST TIME! I am going to beat you without mercy, you never stood a chance against me when my knee was out and you are in even deeper shit now that I am at 100% again! You and I are I hate to admit it cut from the same cloth there demon boy. Both about as brutal in the ring as can be, and both willing to spit in the face of conventional wisdom. The thing is that you spit into the wind when you spit at me. I am twice as brutal as you, I am...Hell....I AM THE NASTIEST BASTARD IN THE ACW!!!!!!!! Pissing on your world title don’t make you the man...pissing on legacies destroying legends and toppling champions makes you the man. That’s just a hard mother fucking fact of life. Some are haves and some are have nots. You ain’t got shit Shank while me....hell I am the fucking name on the federation these days. The thing that you are going to realize is that it isn’t the size difference that is going to do it. It will come at that point when I have you beat. When I have you laid out on the mat after the AC bomb

*a little rumble from the fans.*

AC: Oh yeah...you are going to see it tonite! Shank after I have you laid out on this mat, bloody broken. Your sternim crushed....all that cartlage in your chest ripped across...your ribs floating around in your body, and your collapsed lungs screaming in your body for that air that they need so bad....Shank after all that....the thing that makes the difference is going to come into play. Unlike you...I won’t take the pin. I will lift you up again, and slam you down. I will do it again and again and again. Until I can’t take it anymore. Until I find that place in my heart that most folks call a conscience. Until I find that thing that makes me stop out of pity for you. I have NEVER felt that tug in my career....and who knows I may not feel it in time to not completely DESTROY YOURS! Your skull will be cracked your lips will burn at the taste of your own blood and the only thing that is going to save you you skinny little runt is something I ain’t sure I have....a heart. SHANK call your next o kin ifn ya gots any cuz tanite AC is gonna wipe ya off da map!!!!!!!

*AC laughs out right the fans seem a little disgusted.*

AC: Moving right along....Konvicted Felon!!!!! What the fuck happened there champ?!? One day you win the world title then you never interview you never open your mouth you piss that belt, that belt that meant the world to me away. Then you come out and say you are retired, that "Dis Mutha fucka nose when ese beat" What the fuck?!? You beat yourself like I always predicted you would. Always told you you didn’t have the nads to be a champion...Hell...in your case to even be A MAN!!!!!! You go ahead and wander off into the sunset without a fight with out any fanfare with only one sentence, shit that is how you came in that is how you ought to go out, Not with a bang not with a whimper, but with what....TWO PUMPS AND A QUIVVER?!? You fucked us all and I don’t care how these fans feel how the other bookers feel, Kon you are a dickless fuck. You beat yourself Kon, got sloppy ran off with Funk another chump changer to go off and start another DUD fed that is Funk’s trade mark. The best part was the last one that you chumps started you made yourself that chamion. Hell even I don’t have the unmitigated levels of patheticness that you have. Kon you don’t deserve a send off, you deserve to be forgotten and your name erased from the history books...I can’t believe that I had to waste two ppvs fighting you. You never deserved my title and you never deserved my time. FUCK YOU KON!!!!!! Stay gone there ain’t no room for a pathetic never will be like you in my federation! Fuck off!

*The fans are enraged at AC’s statements and the chants start "GO TO HELL!" AC waves it off.*

AC: Now, last week me and the boys were toe to toe with the 3-pac, when suddenly the next thing that we know the lights go out our dance partners vanish and the lights go red. I don’t think so. I hear the whispers I hear the rumors. "it’s blood" "Bloodbath is gonna take the company back!" I tell you what tonite Bloodbath where ever you are, probably standing behind Kon in the line at the unemployment office, you are going to watch a guy that thinks he can take the company back for marcus. You are just going to have to watch your commisionership dip into the past. You and me blood we’ve had our go arounds but you are hardly the man you were then, you aren’t even the man who kicked off the UEW, I’ve seen you lay down to such a bunch of losers and chumps here you are at best a husk and any rumor that you are spreading about a come back about stopping the ACW lay it to rest you ald ass cooze. You might as well just mix up a geritol smoothy and lay out on the couch and watch some old NWF days and try and recapture some of the magic that you don’t got anymore! So if you are all looking for a red light tonite....I’d not hold my breath. By the nights end there will be no denying that .....I AM THE NASTIEST BASTARD IN THE FEDERATION!!!!!!

*AC slams the mic down and heads for the entrance. The fans are negative but loud!!!!*

Tim: Wow! Folks we have to go this segment is desperately long! We’ll be back!!!!!

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Tim: We've got some Jr. Heavyweight action coming up for you now, folks, as well as a, uh, re-debut.

Bowar: Yeah, one of these guys disapeared a few months back, then recently showed up again, saying he's reinvented himself. I'll bet he sucks both ways.

Tim: What? You didn't even bother to watch the tapes! How would you know?

Bowar: All wrestlers can figure out how good the others are, just by looking at 'em.

Tim: Look, for the last fucking time, YOU'VE NEVER WRESTLED!!! So shut up!

Bowar: Taylor, you sexy thing you, announce this match!

Taylor: This is a single fall match, with a time limit of 20 minutes! First, from Charleston, SC, at 6'11" and 190lbs, this is Travis "Thunder" Tiger!!!

*Faith, by Limp Bizkit plays as Tiger and Gerbus come out to a mild pop, mostly because they haven't been seen in a while. Tiger climbs into the ring while Gerbus takes a seat at ringside.*

Taylor: And his opponent for the evening, standing 6'3" and weighing 230lbs, from Parts Unknown, "Extreme" Alucard!!!

*Alucard rips through the curtains to a mixed reaction, more boos than cheers. He runs down the ramp and slides into the ring.*

Bowar: Oh yeah, the guy who says he's a vampire. What a moron.

Tim: If you don't believe him, then why are you wearing garlic around your neck?

Bowar: Uhh, I'm not.

Tim: Yeah, sure you aren't. That smell must be your aftershave. What is it, L'eau de Garlic?

Bowar: Shut up!

Tim: Where'd you get it, "The Vampire Slayer's One-Stop Shop?"

Bowar: SHUT UP!!

DING DING DING

Tim: The bell's gone, and Alucard and Tiger lock up! This is more like a Heavyweight match than a Jr. Heavy. Looks like neither man can gain an advantage... Alucard shifting position, and KNEES TIGER IN THE GROIN!! Tiger goes down like a bag of bones!

Bowar: This Alucard guy certainly has something to prove now that he's making his return to wrestling, and he's taking it out on Tiger! Alucard visciously stomping on the exposed gut of Tiger!

Tim: Alucard signalling to the crowd now, he scoops Tiger up and... FRONT FACE DDT!!! What a move! He's up now, and stomping some more on Tiger! Alucard just dominating this match so far!

Bowar: Yeah, because he's playing dirty! Not that that's a bad thing, mind you. Alucard dragging Tiger to the ropes, and it looks like he's going for a tombstone from the top!

Tim: No, wait... Tiger reverses, and counters with a frankensteiner!! Great move by Tiger, taking Alucard totally by suprise! Tiger getting up now, he crawls over to Alucard, and makes a cover!

REF: 1......2....

Bowar: Alucard kicks out! Both men getting back up now, and Tiger staggers Alucard with a low blow! And another! And another!

Tim: Tiger gaining the offensive through a very effective, if very dirty, strategy. Alucard down to his knees in mind-numbing pain! Tiger runs, and HITS ALUCARD WITH A SUPERKICK!! Alucard goes flying through the ropes and lands hard on the mats! Excellent move by Tiger!

Bowar: Both of these guys definatly have something to prove, and they're really taking it out on each other. Tiger climbs the ropes... and... MOONSAULT ON ALUCARD!! Both men down, those moves really take a lot out of you!

Tim: Alucard getting up first, he hauls Tiger up by the hair, and irish whips him into the steel guard railing! Tiger hits the rail and goes over into the fans!!

Bowar: Alucard grabs a chair and jumps over the rail after Tiger, and fans scatter the hell out of his way! Stupid idiots, stay there!

Tim: Stupid? They're SMART to get out of the way of those two guys!

Bowar: Damnit, I wanted to see some of them get hurt.

Tim: You're a sick, sick bastard, Bowar.

Bowar: Yep, probably.

Tim: Tiger gets up, Alucard swings and connects with Tiger's head with a HUGE CRACK!! We could hear that all the way over here! Alucard plants his boot on Tiger's throat and Ugh!, and starts repeatedly slamming that chair down on Tiger's head! This is horrible! Someone should stop this!

Bowar: NO! LET THIS CONTINUE!! This is fucking awesome! Look at that, the chair's dented! Hahaha! I love this guy!

Tim: Nobody wants to hear about your sick fantasies, Bowar.

Bowar: Fuck you!

Tim: Alucard apparently getting tired of shamshing Tiger's face in, throws the chair away, and starts dragging Tiger back to the ring by the hair! Good god, look at Tiger, his face is just a mess of blood!

Bowar: Alucard throws tiger back into the ring, and looks like he's going for the Raining Blood! No! Tiger reverses and counters with a Rocker Dropper!

Tim: Tiger gets up, and starts savagely kicking away at the groing of Alucard! A little revenge, I guess. Tiger scoops Alucard up now, and ATOMIC DROP!! Fuck, at this rate, Alucard'll never be able to reproduce! Though, that could be a good thing. I'm not sure the world could handle more than one of him.

Bowar: Alucard gets up first, and starts punching Tiger in the face, opening up that already huge cut even more! The blood is just streaming down Tiger's face now!

Tim: Tiger comes up off the floor with a stiff European uppercut! Alucard staggers back to the ropes, comes back and Tiger hits him with a standing sidekick to the chest!

Bowar: Alucard goes back to the ropes again, bounces back and hits Tiger with a clothesline and stays on for the pin!

REF: 1......2.....

Tim: Tiger kicks out! Both men are up now and throwing hard lefts and rights at each other like crazy, though Tiger is at a bit of a disadvantage cause his face is covered with blood!

Bowar: Alucard now does a go behind, but Tiger nails him with a couple quick back elbows! Tiger now goes behind Alucard, and... GERMAN SUPLEX! both men's shoulders are pinned down, and the ref makes a count!

REF: 1......2......3

DING DING DING

Tim: Well the ref now talking with Taylor here, I think I know what's going to happen here... Taylor now raises the mic here...

Taylor: This match has been declared a draw, since both men couldn't get a shoulder up, so it's a double pin!

Bowar: A lot of these lately, ah well... ok, lets just keep this damn thing going! back in a few.

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Bowar: Alright, we're back, with what I'm guessing is just some kind of joke match. Two idiots who have the dumbest gimmick of all time, versus two guys that are fat and stealing a gimmick used by three KISS rip offs and two bald twins in that indy federation in Conneticut.

Tim: We're talking about the Syncronized Swimmers and The Lard Asses. There was only one Lard Ass, but now there's two, so no one really knows what the deal is there, but one must be the original, and the other just some other fat slob. Who really cares?

Bowar: I know I don't, but these teams care because someone has to get a shot at AC and Akona's ACW Tag Team Titles, perhaps that someone will be one of these two teams. Ok Taylor baby, do your thing!

Taylor: This next match is a tag team match scheduled for one fall. Coming to the ring first, from sunny Fort Lauderdale, Florida, at a total combined weight of a trim 468lbs, here are Earl Pool, and Devon Board... THE SYNCRONIZED SWIMMERS!

*Wipeout plays as Earl Pool and Devon Board walk out to a mixed response of boos and laughter, as they did the last time they wrestled. They walk down the ramp matching each other stride for stride, wearing matching blue swim trunks and kneepads. They get into the ring, both sliding in at the exact same time, as the music cuts to some sort of classical music, and the two begin to do some syncronized swimming, which makes the crowd boo and laugh even more.*

Taylor: Uh huh... ok, their opponents... from Kingston Ontario Canada, and St. Louis, weighing in at a total combined weight of 668lbs... Lard Ass Chilly Bunns, and "Lard Ass #2"... THE LARD ASSES!

*Big Bottom by Spinal Tap plays as the golf cart comes out with one of the Lard Asses, and Blubber Love in it. The other walks behind it, then Prichard Simmons runs out too, yelling encouraging things at both of the Lard Asses. the only way to distinguish one from the other is a small "CB" stiched on the side of the one in the golf cart's mask. they finally get to the ring, and the one not in the golf cart jumps up on the apron and climbs in, while the one in the golf cart slowly climbs out, and walks up the stairs, but doesn't bother to get in the ring yet*

Tim: Well I'm guessing that little "CB" on the side of the one guy's mask stands for Chilly Bunns, while the other one is just "Lard Ass #2". That "CB" is barely noticable, and the ref is gonna have a tough time telling these two apart.

Bowar: well the one in the ring seems to be in a bit of shape. He walked down to the ring, and he's not even gasping for air. The Swimmers aren't very easy to tell apart either from the trunks, but they do both look a bit different, and Devon Board is a bit taller and looks to weigh a bit more than his partner.

Tim: Alright the bell rings, and it looks like Devon is going to start off in there against Lard Ass #2. Devon now runs at Lard Ass #2 with a shoulderblock, and Lard Ass #2 doesn't even budge! Devon Board backs up a bit, and Lard Ass #2 taunts him, Devon Board jumps and goes for a dropkick... Lard Ass #2 knocks Devon Board out of the air!

Bowar: These two small guys are going to have a hard time beating these two big guys. Devon quickly back to his feet, and Lard Ass #2 runs at Devon, and nails him with a clothesline! Devon goes down hard!

Tim: the 300 plus pounder now putting the boots to Devon Board here, really stomping the hell out of him! Devon trying to cover up as best he can, but Lard Ass #2 just relentless here. He now stops, and runs to the ropes, comes back, and jumps... Splash... no! Devon rolls out of the way just in time!

Bowar: That was close, that would have crushed the small Devon board, and now Devon rolls over and tags in Earl Pool! Lard Ass #2 gets back to his feet, and both the Swimmers take a run at him, and... double dropkick! Lard Ass #2 reels backwards, but he doesn't go down! Devon and Earl now grab Lard Ass #2 by the arms, and whip him to the ropes... he comes back, and the Swimmers with double spinning back elbows, and the big man goes down!

Tim: These two little guys really know tag team wrestling here. Devon now gets back to his corner and Earl grabs Lard Ass #2 by the mask, and pulls him back to his feet. Earl whips Lard Ass #2 to the ropes, but Lard Ass #2 reverses... Earl hits the ropes and comes back, and goes for a cross body... Lard Ass #2 catches him, and POWERSLAM!

Bowar: Lard Ass #2 now walks over and tags in Lard Ass Chilly Bunns. Earl slowly gets back to his feet, feeling the effects of that powerslam. Chilly Bunns grabs Earl Pool by the hair, and nails him with a hard right hand. He now scoops him up, and bodyslams him down!

Tim: Chilly Bunns now takes a few steps back, then walks up, and jumps... BIG SPLASH BY CHILLY BUNNS! Chilly Bunns now makes a cover!

REF: 1......2..

Bowar: Earl Pool able to kick out! Chilly Bunns with a huge weight advantage over the much smaller Earl Pool here, and he's using it to his advantage here. Chilly Bunns now pulling Earl Pool right back to his feet, and whips him to their corner. Chilly Bunns now tying up the ref, and Lard Ass #2 starts choking Earl Pool with the tag rope!

Tim: Devon Board now climbs into the ring, and the ref now gets over and tries to restrain him, as Chilly Bunns now kicks Earl Pool in the stomach while Lard Ass #2 chokes him. The ref turns around, and Lard Ass #2 stops choking him. Chilly Bunns now tags in Lard Ass #2, as Chilly Bunns pulls Earl Pool out of the corner.

Bowar: Chilly picks up Earl Pool, and slams him to the mat, as Lard Ass #2 now climbs up to the second rope, and... BIG SPLASH FROM THE MIDDLE ROPE! Chilly Bunns climbs out of the ring, and the ref makes the count!

REF: 1......2....

Tim: Earl Pool barely gets a shoulder up, and Lard Ass #2 thought he might have had him there. Lard Ass #2 now pulls Earl Pool back up, and kicks him in the stomach, and sets him up... POWERBOMB... NO! Earl Pool holds onto the mask of Lard Ass #2, and starts punching him in the top of the head, and... FRANKENSTEINER!

Bowar: Earl Pool slowly back to his feet, and stumbles over to his corner, and tags Devon Board back in! Devon Board jumps over the top rope, and Lard Ass #2 gets back to his feet, Devon Board scoops him up, and... he slams him! that's a lot of weight! Devon Board now climbs up to the top rope as quick as possible, and... MOONSAULT! he hits it, and stays on for a cover!

REF: 1......2...

Tim: No that's not gonna do it! Lard Ass #2 throws him off! Devon Board back to his feet, and Chilly Bunns now enters the ring, the ref with his back turned, and he lays Devon Board out with a clothesline! the ref sees this... and he's telling the other Lard Ass to get out of the ring, and he does, well there's that advantage of looking the same, the ref doesn't know what's going on!

Bowar: Chilly Bunns now pulls Devon Board back to his feet... Devon Board with a big right hand to Chilly Bunns chops! he now scoops him up, and slams him down near his corner! Devon tags in Earl Pool, and Earl scales the ropes, and... THE SWAN DIVE SPLASH! the other Lard Ass comes in but Devon cuts him off, and the ref makes the count!

REF: 1......2......3

DING DING DING

Taylor: Here's your winners... the Syncronized Swimmers!

Tim: the Swimmers win, and they slide out of the ring... and jump into Lard Asses Golf Cart! what's this all about? they drive it up the ramp, and the Lard Asses just stare and watch as Chilly Bunns cart goes!

Bowar: Chilly Bunns extremely pissed off I'll bet, he's gonna have to WALK all the way back, and that ramp is a bit raised!

Tim: Yeah, well that's just too bad I'm sure... alright, we're gonna keep this show moving, when we come back, more ACW action!

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Tim: Ok, we're back, and...

["Don't trend on me begins to play as Davey appears in a very supporting crowd which gives a huge reaction upon the first time they saw him since Slaughter.]

Bowar: Guess we got other things going on here.

[He is dressed in a white shirt, shorts, and boots, with his left knee all bandaged up as he walking down with crutches. Along his side comes Jennifer Callihan, staying by Davey side in Melissa absence. As people help the man into the ring, he finally centers himself in the crowd who is giving him an applause in his brave return to the mats, even if it is short. Davey grabs the microphone, and begin to speak.]

Davey: There have been several issues that have been brought out, that I wish to address. For those who have seen in your local grocery stores, the stories about me being on my deathbed, and all this crap.. the rumors of dying or death have been greatly exaggerated. Of course, the news story isn't quite useless, the paper is just soft enough to wipe your ass and flushing down the toilet.

Davey: Another issue, have been, Davey.. are you going to retire for good? I have had some people come up to me, and say I have given enough to the sport, and it would probably be best if I did. The truth is, I don't think I have given enough. [the crowd reacts] You see, where I am from, you don't go to bed until you given your daily best. So be truthfully honest, I haven't given my daily best yet, so I will be smoking all night long! [the crowd reacts again] So as far as me retiring, Eh-Ehhh ain't happening. [the crowd gives a long lasting reaction of cheers before calming down for Davey to speak again.]

Davey: On the other note..T.n.T! [the crowd working up] You come up from behind, and stabbed me in the back. When we split as tag team partners, AND as a stable, I left without any altercations of any kind. I left because I needed to be me, not your version of me! Then in the locker room, you attack me, from behind, and this doesn't quite settle with me! Believe me, pay back is a bitch, cause this is my plan to retribute this matter. The next coming supercard.. you..me.. in the ring. Oh no, TnT, I am not letting you off as easy as that! You see, I don't want to pin you.. I don't want to make you submit.. I want you to say "I QUIT!" [crowd mixed] You, Me, in an I QUIT match, and if you know anything about me, Joe.. I don't know the meaning of the words I QUIT! [crowd reacts mixly!]

Davey: And speaking of cocksuckers like TnT, I hear there is a new boss in town! Oh yea, that fine with me, cause we all know how much I hate Bosses! [cheering on!] So I don't care if it is Marcus, AC, or the Jollygreen Giant, when you sit your ass in that office, I will take your ass and shove it out the window![crowd reacts] So AC, be warned, cause I am bit loony, a bit..rabid.. and I will strike at any fucking time! And that all I have say about you jackass!

Davey: Everyone wants to know about Justin Sane.[crowd reacts real good]. Well, I will hand it to you, you put up a great fight. Sure we talked a lot, but in the end when it came to action, I think the ratings for the show sky rocketed, cause we sure beat the hell out of eachother! So kid.. no, I can't can call you a kid anymore. You are the Man.. You are the Myth.. and hell, you one heck of a guy. We had some great fights together, and I have grown some respect for you..and that enough of the sentimental crap!

Davey: I am not here to start no god damn revolution. I am not here to join anybody. I am here, to kick some ass, and that is about all I am going to do.. cause AC ain't got the balls to do anything about it!

[The music begins to start as Davey exits the ring, and head to the backroom with Jenn helping him along.]

Tim: Well Davey Scott making his way back to the ACW here, and who knows where this is going, but you know he wants TNT!

Bowar: That could be a great match, former partners colide... but for now, we gotta take another break, coming up... more wrestling I would guess!